SURF TIPS WITH LAYNE
PART TWO: AGGRESSION

I've actually been out at Sunset and been sent in. I was the one being aggressive. The contest had finished for the day and no one was out there, so I was the first one out. It was 6- to 8- feet, with an occasional 10-foot set. It was really playful. I don't know if you can call 10-foot sets playful, but it was fun. I was trying to be really aggressive so I could get as many waves as I could before everyone else got out. That's normal, especially for Hawaii because it's always so crowded out there. I took off on a wave and someone snaked me, so I pulled off and my board went over the falls. It hit the arm of a guy who was paddling out. It didn't cut him, it just dead-armed him or bruised him, it wasn't that bad.

He started yelling at me: "F--king professional surfers, you're all the f--king same. You want every f--king wave out here. You just need to slow down. Go in! Get out of here! Go in!"

I just looked at him and went, "No."

I calmly explained: "I have just as much of a right to be out here. I'm sorry my board hit you. It was an accident. I didn't do it on purpose. I'm out here practicing for a contest. I need this time out here, so don't try and ruin it for me. I'm sorry, again. Get over it."

And he said, "No, go in."

And I said, "I'm not going in."

It's hard for girls. The water is so male-dominated. It's difficult to put yourself up against people and things that make you uncomfortable. I know girls hate feeling intimidated, and they hate feeling weak and it's painful to confront things that hurt you. So when you go out there and feel like you're going to be put down, it can be self-defeating -- but only if you let it. Being timid is what's going to hold you back in every aspect of surfing. Once again, it's all about your mentality: the way you look at it, the way you deal with it. Next time you're cowering when you should be powering, consider this:

Stand up for Your Rights
It's important to stand up for yourself. That's the only way they're going to be granted a little more respect. People will abuse you in order to get control over you. They want to make you feel timid, or convince you shouldn't be out there, like they own it and you owe them for allowing you to be out there. Remember the only person who has the right to decide whether or not you should be out there is you.

Don't Compare Apples and Oranges
I always remind my friends that I was a beginner once, too. I caught so much crap from the guys in the water for being a girl out there. It was back in the day when it really wasn't acceptable for girls to be in the water. I know I used to put myself down before anyone else had a chance to. I was hurting myself instantly in order to prevent someone else from doing it. It gets to a point where you feel like you're not good enough. But then you ask yourself: who are you not good enough for? There's no point in comparing yourself to other people. You are good enough if you want to be. But it's going to take time and energy and embarrassment and pain. It doesn't happen overnight. You just have to want it. That's where being aggressive comes in.

Intimidation Doesn't Discriminate
Everyone feels intimidated by surfers who are better than they are, and it's not just the girls. Imagine how I felt in the Mentawais sitting in the lineup with Occy, Shane Beschen and Sunny Garcia! But then I noticed that there were times they would take a spot down the line when they weren't feeling good enough, too. It's the same thing when I'm freesurfing with guys who aren't as good as I am -- they get intimidated by me. It's just that pecking order thing, and it's something you'll have to face with surfing no matter what level you're at.

If You Can't Beat 'Em, Don't Join Them
Most good waves are going to have a thick crowd. Unless your skills and confidence are as high as the majority of guys out there, you're not going to get a wave. If you feel like you should sit inside with the grommets, then that's what you should do. Or, go off and surf waves that are of lesser value until you get your confidence up and increase your ability until you're comfortable enough to get in there and fight for your fair share of waves. If you keep putting yourself in a situation where you're too timid to be catching waves, you're not going to progress.

You Need the Skills to Pay the Bills
Ultimately, you have to have the confidence to go. If you don't, whether you're good enough or not, you shouldn't be out there. Especially when you're learning, it's best to find a wave that's not so crowded, or to go out with friends so you're not embarrassed wiping out and don't feel bad about not being good. Stick to surfing where you're more comfortable and stay there until you know you're ready to step up.

The Last Word (Because I always have the last word!)
Just have fun and build up your confidence. You can't expect to just go out there and take it. You'll know when you are ready.